The Bride and His Groom

Christ has called me to love like He loves the Church. How on earth am I to do that? In this very question lies the answer. I cannot, in my earthly strength, even begin to fathom what it means to love in a pure sense; to love with a perfect love that Christ offers to His bride. I am broken and undone, unable to comprehend what love is without Christ daily pouring out an extra measure of grace to cover my filthy stains. Every day I obsess with those things from which Christ has freed me. I return to my whorring on the street corner and becoming indebted to the fleshly master of sin. Daily, Christ taps into the mercy that was afforded on the cross and pays my sin debt. This is the love of the Groom toward His bride. This is the love that I am to have. Only in a daily recognition of my sin and a pleading for the view of this love will I be able to take small steps toward loving in this manner.

Being vulnerable

Trust is not something that comes natural to me. I do not know if this is something that has always been my nature or if perhaps life experience has produced such a tendency to mistrust and hold others at arms' length. However, throughout my own introspection I find it particularly hard to share my inner feelings with those I want share the most. It seems that my inner conscious knows my desire to open up and be vulnerable, and therefore the message from my heart is interrupted before it can be fully expressed from my tongue. I become closed, mute, and seemingly callous. It is a frustrating state of emotion for both me and those to whom I want to be close. I hope that soon my tongue will be freed from its apparent steel cage of mistrust. I will reach a place where I can live freely in the uncomfortable, but wonderful world of being vulnerable.